apparently I bought one of those from Ali.
https://www.xiongmaitech.com/en/index.php/product/product-detail/230/234/506
Firmware is V5.07.X02.000A07F3.10010.346732.0000010.
OFC bootloader is password protected :(
But I could downgrade the FW I guess?
(according to https://github.com/OpenIPC/wiki/blob/master/en/help-uboot.md#bypassing-password-protected-bootloader)
But where would I find an old FW for that device or at least one that will flash and get me into the bootloader at least?
Doesn't really matter if the rest is bricked at that point.
Please don't send me to Telegram.